The myth of Narcissus constitutes the archetypal root of the character structure of narcissism. Aspects of narcissism run from the healthy developmental narcissism of a child to the toxic narcissism of the psychopath, but all have in common a lack of empathy, whether momentary or chronic. We offer some thoughts on how to tell if you are in a relationship with a narcissist and what to do about it.
Here’s the dream we discuss:
“My ex-wife moves back in together, and then she starts belittling (me) like she used to when we were together, which I don’t like. After she does it a few times, I determinedly tell her to move out, and then I remember that she moved into my house, not the other way around—I don’t have to allow her to stay.”
You guys are super!! I’ve only just come across your podcasts and they are super! Can you talk some more another time about your approach to treating the narcissist herself?
That’s a great idea Hazel. Discussing how to facilitate character transformation is a deep topic.
I find a lot of common threads in this narrative.
The way I heard it, neurotics make themselves miserable, and personality disorders make everyone else miserable.
Lol -that sounds reasonably true.
My parents, brothers and ex wife fall under the narcissist/psychopath spectrum. I’m the idiot, also called the empath/Co-dependant????.
Are these conditions treatable or curable
Narcissistic character traits are generally treatable. A long analysis can generally facilitate character transformation. Jungians are one of the few schools of thought that hold this view. I would suggest reading the matrix and meaning of character by Doherty and West. This should help provide a view of character structure and a sense of how that can change. Take care of yourself!
I realise i am comming very late to this party but thought i’d post my comment anyway. I had a dream about a female vampire a while ago which led me to investigate my narcissistic tendencies and found that narcissistically wounded is a more appropriate term for me. Through a course i have had to do a ritual which was called a self annointing ritual. While i was doing it i realised this could borderline narcissism but it felt genuinly good. In this ritual I claimed myself and important things i have learned, done or which are a part of my caracter or who i am and annointed myself as the carrier of these qualities. I feel that this act in ritual form really boosted my confidence, my capacity to acknowledge myself and see what i am about and positively affirm myself. The beauty of it was that nature was my only witness so there was no need to be more then i am. Which actually is quite grand if you look beyond the ego. I feel like this promoted a healthy sense of narcissism in me. A confidence to claim my ground in life and i feel less dependend on what others might or might not validade within me. Here is to speak for a healthy sense of narcissism in an adult and healing of a narcissistic wound caused by not being seen and validated (mirrored you called it). That mirroring and seeing/empathy might actually come from a healthy part within ourselves so we are less dependent on our beloved ones giving us what we could not get / claim as a child. A healthy sense of self.