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AMOR FATI: Love of One’s Fate

Mar 10, 2022

Padlocks hang on a rope. The central lock is red and heart-shaped, illustrating Amor Fati.
Photo Credit: Petar Milošević via Wikimedia commons

In Greek mythology, three Fates represented life forces beyond our control. One spun the thread of life, another determined its length, and the third cut it. Jung, however, understood that fate was also the external expression of an internal situation that had not been made conscious. In other words, we may unconsciously participate in creating our own misfortune and call it bad luck, injustice—or fate. How we orient ourselves to what happens to us is crucial, and working toward self-awareness helps us find a path between feeling powerless and seeking control. Ultimately, however, we are called to embrace life as it is, not as we wish it to be. This means moving beyond ego-consciousness to discover the inner center Jung called the Self. If we know we are part of something larger, we can accept our authentic nature, say yes to life in the face of uncompromising reality, and love our fate.

Here’s the dream we analyze:

“I am standing looking in the bathroom mirror over the sink. A man, who is now deceased, a former boyfriend from when I was 19 with whom I had a romantic relationship, comes up behind me and puts his arms around me. I lean back and relax into his chest. He is tall and strong, and it feels like we are a safe harbor for one another, even a part of one another. We share a feeling of complete trust and peace. I seem to know in the dream that he is no longer physically alive. Then the scene changes, and I am with another man in an apartment with clothes and musical instruments lying about. We are looking into the whites of one another’s eyes, trying to see one another’s souls. Our faces are so close our foreheads are almost touching. It feels like we are connecting soul to soul. It feels sublime to connect in this way. He is also tall and strong, but not someone I ever had an intimate relationship with. He was a member of my extended friend group, a musician who writes scores for movies, and who other musicians in our group referred to as a musical genius, but I have not seen him in years. Still, I don’t seem to be surprised in the dream to be sharing such a spiritual connection with him. The depth of feeling between us sweeps away everything else. I wake up from these two encounters feeling whole and fulfilled.” 

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